Starbucks UniFrappe: Liquid Unicorns or Liquid UniCant's?

By now I'm sure there's no one left in the US who hasn't heard of Starbucks' newest drink, the Unicorn Frappucino. There have been tons of Instagram photos of it, articles discussing how the baristas are all definitely about to mutiny, Katy Perry spitting it out after one sip, and some woman telling her husband about her pregnancy with it.

Prepare your retinas AND your taste buds to be seared!

In my tiny corner of the internet, I am known as a Unicorn Lover (some might say "Expert"). I have unicorn art on my walls, unicorn soap, unicorn clothing, unicorn makeup brushes, and even a giant, hand-painted carousel unicorn in my living room.

Of course I'd been tagged in posts about this upcoming drink approximately 8,437 times in the week leading up to the release. I had seen the ingredients list. I had extreme reservations at the idea of the "mango and sour" flavors it was going to have.

But I persevered because how could I not? I am a Unicorn Lover. I prepared my pancreas by giving it a blanket, a hot tea, and lots of soothing affirmations. I also set up an Instagram Live event, because by golly, if I was gonna do this, I needed an audience!

I wanted to order a Short. Really, I did. I did not WANT 33g of sugar floating in my bloodstream, or my pancreas turning to dust in a fit of frustration. But alas, Starbucks told me no. I was forced to get the Tall size, and, for the sake of the food illustration and full experience, I also got it with the dang whipped cream.

It was a rather pretty, saturated confection with swirls of retina-searing magenta and blue. The cloud of whipped cream looked lovely with the pink, glittery sugar topping all of its white crests. Alas, it was supposed to also have blue powder, but I think my Starbucks decided I didn't need it in my life. Maybe that was a blessing in disguise at the end. I had to add the blue in the illustration on my own, for accuracy.

So. I had an audience, an extremely, extremely brightly colored drink, and had prayed to the insulin gods.

It was time.

The first sip was an actual punch in the face. We're talking mouth puckering, eyes watering, absolute gag reflex. I had accidentally gotten a full mouth of just the blue sour syrup... and it had been several decades since the last time I'd had a Warhead candy. It caught me completely by surprise, and I had to take a moment to recover before I could continue. The pink part didn't really taste like mango-- it was more just... "fruit." Once I swirled some of the blue and pink together (and no, Hungry Readers, it did not color change), the sour and fruit worked together to make.... a new flavor.

A flavor that wasn't bad. But it also wasn't good. I didn't completely hate it, but I also definitely did not want to drink the rest. I ended up having about half, but by this point I'd hit about 17g of sugar and I tapped out.

I'm sort of offended, honestly. Here I am, a resident Unicorn Expert, and Starbucks didn't consult me on what unicorns taste like? I mean, they didn't consult Katy Perry either, but I digress. Unicorns do not taste like sour mangoes, or sour fruit of any sort. They taste like marshmallows. Maybe cotton candy (although I'm not a fan of that, personally). Perhaps they could even taste like white chocolate. But sour mangoes? No, sir, I don't like it.

Here's my main takeaway: it was a fun promotion, and I'm glad I gave it a try. I got to do a nice illustration of it, and I don't have many reasons to bust out  markers that are that bright, usually. As a matter of fact, I didn't have all the shades I needed in that level of brightness, so I did have to do a bit of digital work after I scanned the original.

Perhaps some may say that us mere mortals can't fully appreciate the taste of unicorns, but I for one think that's not the issue. I believe we mortals can't possibly imitate the magic that is unicorns. We shot for the moon and landed... I dunno, somewhere in west Jersey?

If you also want to have a sugar rush and then a headache afterward, make sure to get your drink by this Sunday when the promotion ends!

Trader Sam's Passionate Python

Lemony Snake-it's "Series of Unfortunate(ly Empty Cuz I Drank Them) Drinks"

I went to Trader Sam's Enchanted Tiki Room at Disneyland recently, and ordered this delightful drink called The Passionate Python. "Ah," you say, "NOW I get the joke in the caption." Well ssssspotted, Hungry Reader! This drink is described in the menu as "Dark and Aged Rums, Red Passion Fruit and Tropical Juices garnished with an Orange Peel 'Python.'"

I really enjoy drawing drinks-- there's a fun challenge in their simplistic design. Drawing glass and getting the subtle gradients shifts in the liquids just right can be tough, especially with markers. Markers are a rather unforgiving medium, mind you. One small twitch and it's all over.*

This particular illustration was an exercise in playing with layering techniques. I don't like going straight into a piece with my most vibrant marker-- no no! I'd rather layer a saturated color over a less saturated base to keep the color from becoming unnatural (not... that the color of this drink was natural, but I digress).

To achieve this bright red orange without going overboard, I first put down a layer of Goldenrod (PM-69), put Poppy Red (PM-13) on top, and then finished it with hits of Scarlet Lake (PM-5).

"But what about that ghostly lemon peel and the straws in there?" you wonder. There are clearly no pen lines, so how did I do that? I'll tell you in Parseltongue: Ssssssssssss sssssssssasaaasss sassssssssss shhhh sssssss!

You're welcome.

*Note to self and others: Do not attempt to Marker while drinking the subject of this illustration. The results won't go well! Please Marker responsibly.

Review: Fiesta Martin

Yes, that fish still has its head

So my husband and I moved last fall, and in our old neighborhood we had an amazing sushi place. It was so good that we went about once a week. We always lamented though, "Gosh, we really wish we had a good Mexican place around here."

Lo and behold, our new neighborhood has a dearth of sushi (sigh), but has the exact sort of Mexican place we asked for: Fiesta Martin at 1330 N La Brea. We've been here quite a few times, and the atmosphere is warm and inviting. The service can be a little slow, but it never lacks for friendliness. I think we've had the exact same waiter every time, and this dude is just the nicest. Is he the Martin that likes to Fiesta? I can't say.

The menu here is nothing short of huge-- there's an array of house specials, seafood, caldos (soup), and appetizers. Their tacos are tasty, the fajitas phenomenal, and the burritos boat-sized. For me, a win is that they have chimichangas. I know that they may be a cross-cultural invention... but I just happen to like them. Also, their salsa is of particular interest to me, as it doesn't have many onions/the onion chunks are large enough that I can pick them out.*

A repeat dish I've ordered is the mojarro frita , which is an entire tilapia, deep-fried. Yes, with the head on. It's crispy, light, and is seasoned well. There are also plenty of things that are more traditional like the Milanesa (A+!), and then some truly this-is-a-bad-idea-but-it-looks-so-good dishes such as the Camarones Costa Azul (A+ for clogging ones' arteries!).

The chili powder on the rim was a... surprise

The drink menu is staggering as well-- they've got standard margaritas, and then complex, frankly ridiculous-looking cocktails that feature sidecars and upside down beer bottles that seem to defy the laws of gravity.

My favorite drink, however, is called the Cantarito and it originates from Jalisco, Mexico. It's served in a clay pot, has tequila, grapefruit soda, various fruit juices, and then has bits of fruit floating on the top. Plus, the drink is less than $8. As a previous graduate student, that is the perfect price to get a bit fancy, especially here in Los Angeles.

So is the food good? 4 out of 5 tacos!

Expensive? Nope

It's LA, what's the parking like? Meh, there's a tiny parking lot out back, and some street parking in the surrounding neighborhood.

Good for groups?  Yes

Reservation required? Nope!

Is it QUIET? No, but especially no when there's some sportsball game going on.

Final verdict: YUM. Fiesta on, Martin. Fiesta on.

*No, I don't hate onions. I actually rather like them, but I have to keep my diet fairly low FODMAP, which I will get into at a later date on this blog. Feel free to Google it now if you like though. Go on, you know you're curious.

Heeeey Margarita!

There aren't many uses for this lime green color marker... besides this.

So this "drawing my food thing" began with me just sketching various things I ate for lunch. After a few goes at it, I found another simple and easy object to practice drawing-- drinks. I have frequent access* to them and they're visually interesting, so it seemed like an easy fit. This and the last drawing in particular were the first time I'd attempted to add some color into the mix with my old pals: Prismacolor Markers.

In undergrad in 2007, I did an entire semester of independent study with markers, so I own over 100 of the things. I know, I know. Sacrifice food for the expensive art supplies, I know.

Anyway, I spent three months finding only two books on the subject out in the wide, wide world, and one cost $70. $70! Do you know how many bottles of very cheap wine that is? Or alternately, it's about 20 markers.

I instead made my own book that was a glorious 60 pages of swatches, technique trial and error, and my first set of fully-rendered marker pieces. Where is that book now, you may ask? No clue. I may have chucked it at one point, once I went to grad school and was told that digital art was the way of the future. What a letdown, am I right?

Fast forward ten years, and I'm finally using them again.** I still love and need my computer to maintain an income, but it feels SO GOOD to get away from that glowing screen and make something with my hands again.

*I mean, I AM an artist. Writers have this same thing too, I hear.

**Can we talk about how amazing it is that they haven't dried out in all this time??

Wine o' Clock

When you want some wine, but all you have in your pocket is $2

Who doesn't love a good drink after work? I used to hate wine, but became a huge fan of it when I was in grad school; I was living in the wine-centric city of San Francisco at the time. Sonoma and Napa are just two hours north, after all!

I even remember my first lesson about wine types outside of just knowing them as "red" or "white." I was invited to a dinner at my friend Maggie's house, and she told me to "bring a cab." In confusion, I showed my ignorance by asking if she meant I should use a cab to get to her house.

"Oh... um. No, it's a wine. Look for a sign in the grocery store that reads Cabernet Sauvignon."

My friends in San Francisco were exceptionally patient with me. I still laugh to this day about some of the dumb questions I asked them!

That evening was my introduction to what would end up becoming my favorite type of red wine even to this day. I really enjoy the dry "punch you in the mouth" flavors that Cabs typically have.

That said, wine is also expensive, especially for an at-the-time graduate student. How does one solve this problem? Why Two Buck Chuck, of course! I learned it was easy to budget for $2/bottle every now and then, and so "Wine O' Clock" (also known as "Sunday Wineday") was born.